Just Keep Swimming

Power. Persuasion. Planning.

Day Two

            Today was about dreams.  Am I living my life?  What makes my life well lived?   Can a man have too many adventures, or does he just miss out the adventures he didn't plan to not plan?  Suppose I decide to follow God's lead, to take the hints He has so deliberately delivered to my door step.  Will I make more of my life?  Is it that simple?  Too bad the world doesn't know the terribly interesting details that led to these thoughts and this new paradigm.

            I wrote a paper about goals because I felt I needed to do more with my time.  Someone told me that God judges us based on what we do with time when we have it.  I have succeeded in consuming movies and television by the boat load, assuming that it is okay to do so based on the rigorous 8 months I lived prior to this current time of unemployment.   Whether I deserved the time off or needed it, I took it.  I have always watched television, and I suppose deciding what is too much is the issue.  

             I am finding out more about me, and I like it.  The more inundated I become in my own, true self the more i want to learn more; have I said more than enough?   But, taking into consideration the eternal implications of learning more about myself, I think it is fair to say that more is the word in this case.  I indeed want to have more of me to go around.  I want to make goals that fulfill dreams I have and have not defined.  I want to live in a step by step pattern of awesomeness and self-discovery.  I want to be the most of me that anyone has ever seen, because it will be peaceful for me and peaceful to be known.   

           I finished that paper and presentation on goal setting and felt immediately in cognitive dissonance, which was the idea behind tackling the unmentioned real cause of unrest that I live with everyday, to self-medicate by choosing to refresh the importance of goal setting in my mind, so as to push myself toward a better life.  Goal setting will help manage the time I have into a cognitive dissonance killer.  All the knowledge I have that contradicts the things I actually do or accomplish can be affronted by a valiant and dubious effort to change in all the right directions, one direction at a time.

           The guilt and mental energy of knowing I should or could be doing something better with my time will be absolved by the setting of effective goals.  I ran into a woman I barely know today and talked on and on about the vision mapping process.  I was able to tell her the process verbatim because I was searching for a goal setting outline in my head, and God played me the one I had on my iPod from Steven K. Scott.  I had my i-pod on shuffle while cleaning my room and just happened to hear all about using goals and steps and tasks to fulfill my dreams in the categories of life that I have priorities in.  I'm stoked.

            I do have a vision of some things that I would like to see happen in my life.   Setting a goal and some steps toward reaching my dream of playing piano and singing jazz at the same time is very doable.  I can learn a new piano song every two months until I can play it well enough to sing the lyrics.  That would bring me great joy.  I would learn and memorize the lyrics to new love/jazz songs once a month as well.  I'm planning on listing other dreams and mapping them out too; spiritual and life-long dreams of more consequence.  I have found and now testify that writing out and planning slow growth diffuses the ominousness of the tasks that I have associated with the goals and dreams in my head.
             Bed time.